Lady Mondegreen

The Filkers Who Don't Sing Anything

We are the filkers who don't sing anything
We just pass when our turn comes round
And if you ask us "Do you sing anything?"
We'll just tell you: "We don't sing anything!"

Well, I've never sung at Conterpoint, I've never sung at Consonance
I've never sung at Worldcon or at Dragoncon at all
And I've never gone GAFilking and I've never sung at housefilks
And I don't sing in Columbus in the fall!

    'Cause we're the filkers who don't sing anything...
Oh, I've never filked the Beatles and I've never filked Paul Simon
And I've never filked Stan Rogers with his stuff from Concert Hall
And I don't filk Misty Lackey and I don't filk Echo's Children
And I don't sing in Columbus in the fall!

    'Cause we're the filkers who don't sing anything...
Oh, I've never sung of mermaids and I've never sung of faeries
And I've never sung of spaceships with a load of ore to haul
And I've never sung of chocolate and I've never sung of fandom
And I don't sing in Columbus in the fall!

(Background humming of tune over spoken exchange:
"But if I don't write music and I don't write lyrics and I don't even sing or play an instrument,
how can I call myself a filker?"
"Well, you're here, aren't you?"
"Yes, but..."
"Sitting in a filk circle at a filk convention?"
"Yes, but..."
"Like, on purpose?"
"Well, yes, but..."
"You're a filker. Why are we still talking about this?")

Oh, I've never sung "Hope Eyrie" and I've never sung "The Phoenix"
And I've never sung along when "Sam's Song" makes the whole room bawl
And I don't sing "March of Cambreadth" and I WON'T sing "Banned from Argo"...
(Spoken: "Yup, you're a filker all right!")
And I don't sing in Columbus in the fall!

Lorelei is (c) Philip Chevron and the Pogues